As my wife and I kneel to pray, I express gratitude for our many blessings, and sometimes I think that I have been a pretty “good boy” in doing my church duties and responsibilities. When I get a little proud that way, I will sometimes begin to doubt and to think that I am not that good. Good compared to who? Sometimes I feel that I am not good at all. I remember Nephi, who, in my estimation, was, in fact, a near perfect man. In 2 Nephi, he states the following: “Nevertheless, notwithstanding the great goodness of the Lord, in showing me his great and marvelous works, my heart exclaimeth: “O wretched man that I am! Yea, my heart sorroweth because of my flesh; my soul grieveth because of mine iniquities. I am encompassed about, because of the temptations and the sins which do so easily beset me. And when I desire to rejoice, my heart groaneth because of my sins; nevertheless, I know in whom I have trusted.” (2 Nephi 4:17–19) Did Nephi actually feel like he was a wretched man? To think that he possibly did see himself that way is when I realize that I must be a really wretched man. But, I will never agree that he was a wretched man; I will always think of Nephi (of old) as a “good man,” even one of the very best and greatest men that I have known.
There are many times when I am at complete and total peace with myself, without any thought of worldly things. I feel good, I am thinking good things, plus I am happy. At times like that, I am reminded of the little boy learning to ride a bike, who said, “Hey dad! I have learned that if I keep pedaling, I won’t fall over.” When I feel good about myself, I, too, think that I need to keep on peddling, and maybe I won’t fall off that peaceful and happy moment that I am feeling. Yes, I have sinned; you, too, have problems from time to time, as do all humans. Even you, the person reading this thought: For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God; (Romans 3:23) Does that make you a bad person?
While reading the scriptures, I sometimes come upon statements like this: “And the watchman said, Me thinketh the running of the foremost is like the running of Ahimaaz the son of Zadok. And the king said, He is a good man, and cometh with good tidings.” (Samuel 18:27) Ahimaaz, “He is a good man.” I can’t think of a greater compliment than that. I, too, have been called a “good man,” and it makes me blush. Maybe a man can be a good man, even if he is not a perfect man, even if he, like Nephi, feels sometimes like he is a “wretched” man. I believe it is true. I think we all, save maybe Christ and Job, feel wretched from time to time, and yet there are many good men and good women. Like me, men and women who are not perfect in every way, maybe even wretched from time to time, but they are good men and good women. They are people who have families, children who love them, and friends who call them “good.” All we can do is to try to keep pedaling.