I served as a high school counselor for the first seven years of my professional career in education. One of my chores, or more delicately speaking, one of my assignments was to keep the smokers out of the parking lot. I would listen to their sad stories about why I shouldn’t call their parents. After seeing them in the parking lot again the next week, I would use a different approach and ask them, If they thought smoking was good for them and that if they thought it would assure them of a good position in the job of their dreams one day? They would generally agree that if an employer in Utah knew they were a smoker that their chances of getting the job would be diminished. They also agreed that it would significantly reduce their chances of dating the kind of young lady that they would want to marry one day.
Proverb: “A person tends to associate with people who are like him or her. A father advises his son; “Son, when you go away to school, spend your time with serious people; don’t hang around with people who go to parties all the time. If you want to know what kind of person George is, look at his friends. A man is known by the company he keeps.”
A year ago I remember reading a story confirming that same truth even in the animal kingdom.
A man who wanted to buy an jackass went to market, and, coming across a likely-looking beast, arranged with the owner allowing him to take the jackass home on trial to see what he was like. When he reached home, he put him into his stable along with the other jackasses. The newcomer took a look round, and immediately went and chose a place next to the laziest and greediest beast in the stable. When the master saw this he put a halter on him at once, and led him off and handed him over to his owner again. The latter was a good deal surprised to see him back so soon, and said, “What, do you mean to say you have tested him already?” “I don’t want to put him through any more tests,” replied the other.
“I could see what sort of beast he is from the companion he chose for himself.” i.e. “A man is known by the company he keeps.” It is true that a man is known by the company he keeps, but it isn’t always a measure of his character. There is an American proverb that goes as follows: “Reputation is what you are in the light; Character is what you are in the dark.”
When I was a teenager, I smoked, I quit school half way through the 9th grade, and was probably considered a rowdy guy. The ‘good’ kids would never be seen going somewhere or doing some ‘kid things’ with me—my friends were the rowdy ones. (Birds of a feather) Those who knew me then would never recognize me just a few years later. I never did tell the parking lot students how I was as a young person. I was drafted in the U.S. Army when I turned 19 during the Korean Conflict. Shortly after that, I could tell by the training routines that we were required to do, that the smoking had taken a toll on my respiratory system, so after many tries I was able to quit smoking. Shortly after that I joined The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and became quite a different person. The Gospel of Jesus Christ is not a passive religion, members are expected to progress to fulfill their purpose in life. Knowing that and having a desire to be a good man and eventually have a family of my own. After being discharged from the service I married a good woman with my ideals. I went to the university and eventually received a PhD and served as an administrator at a University until I retired.
The question has been answered: A person who once had a less than sterling reputation, in fact a rowdy reputation, can change and become whatever they set their hearts and minds to do. There are even those who become saintly based on the following story poem, by Robert W. Service:
My Madonna
I hailed me a woman from the street, Shameless, but, oh, so fair! I bade her sit in the model’s seat And I painted her sitting there. I hid all trace of her heart unclean; I painted a babe at her breast; I painted her as she might have been If the Worst had been the Best. She laughed at my picture and went away. Then came, with a knowing nod, A connoisseur, and I heard him say; “Tis Mary, the Mother of God.” So I painted a halo round her hair, And I sold her and took my fee, And she hangs in the church of Saint Hilaire, Where you and all may see. Even a woman of the street can become like Mary if she changes her direction.